The Tourture Chamber

911: "911 Emergency response."
Madi: "Hello? Hello. This is Madison A. Dog. I need your help."
911: "What seems to be the problem?"
Madi: " I stink and I don't know why and my moms aren't doing anything about it!"
911: "OK Madison, so why do you stink? What happened?"
Madi: "I don't know.... I did my usual rolls outside and I think I rolled on something stinky. OH GOD. It stinks so bad." (GAG)
911: "OK, Madison..."
Madi: "Please call me Madi."
911: "OK Madi, have you tried getting your mom to smell you?"
Madi: "Yes. I keep walking over to her, but she just keeps saying 'What is that smell?'"
911: "OK"
Madi: "She even lifted my tail up to see if I had a dingle berry stuck to my butt. I wanted to say, MOM! It's not my butt, it's up by my neck!"
911: "So what is your emergency Madi?"
Madi: "So my moms eventually found the smell coming from my neck..."
911: "Well that is good!"
Madi: "NO! They figured it out just as Aunt Janis got here to play with me. I never get to see my Aunt Janis."
911: "Don't worry Madi. Aunt Janis isn't going anywhere."
Madi: "But I stink! And the moms are getting the torture chamber ready for me!!"
911: "Tortuer Chamber??? Madi, are you being harmed in anyway? Do you need me to send SPCA to come get you?"
Madi: "I have only been in the torture chamber once!!! Oh god, Mom is lifting me up and getting ready to put me in it!!!! Help me!!!"
911: "Madi, I am going to get SPCA on line two. You hold on."
Madi: "I can't hold on... oh wait. It looks like Moms will be getting in the tub with me..."
911: "Tub? Madi, what are you talking about?"
Madi: "The Torture Chamber, mom is getting in the tub with me. I have to take a bath because I stink."
911: "So no one is physically hurting you?"
Madi: "No. They are making me take a bath so I will smell pretty again."
911: "OK. It's a good thing you told me Madi, otherwise SPCA was going to come take you away."
Madi: "NO!! I love my moms!!!! NO!!"
911: "It's OK Madi, it seems like your moms have everything under control. And just think, when you are done with the bath, Aunt Janis will be waiting to play with you."
Madi: "Really?? OH Thank you nice 911 operator! I love you! Until I talk to you next time, Good Day!"

Bone Dog

 This is my favorite toy Bone Dog. I got him two Christmases ago as part of a much bigger toy packed that included another one of my toys, Penny. Penny is a penguin with a Santa hat. I love Santa hats and request them of all my toys. Anyway, back to Bone Dog, he is my most favorite toy because he is a dog like me, he has floppy ears and a snout and at times he barks at me. He is also very scared of Muffin for some reason and shivers when he sees her. I have taken bone dog up to the lakes several times and he also comes on car rides with me, but he has yet to stick his head out the window because he is afraid of falling out of the car. Bone Dog, or BD, for short also has a jam, the Bone Dog rap. It is set to the beat of Vanilla Ice's "Ninja Rap". He has released a music video of him rapping which I often use to cheer people up. Bone Dog is my favorite toy, but he has actually been in hiding for most of this summer. He mentioned something about tending to the injuries in his loins (he has a hole in his crotch) and that he needed to take it easy until the winter. Hello again Bone dog! I have missed you. Until next time, Good Day!

Happy Howl-o-Ween!

I am not a fan of dressing up, but if you ask my moms, they will say I do it so well. Howl-o-ween is a time where everyone gets dressed up in silly costumes and goes door to door "begging" for candy. Some people actually call it Beggar's night as little humans go door to door for a few hours in the night and look to fill their pillow cases with sweet, delectable little morsels of food. I myself do not thoroughly enjoy Howl-o-ween, except for the fact that the word "howl" is part of the bigger wood. The costumes scare me and the constant doorbell ringing makes Muffin bark for two straight hours (not that is any different from a normal night). Anyway, to keep us calm and prevent us from being scared, Moms take us out and leave candy for all the little minions to take. When we come home, there is no candy left which is good because who knows where their grimy little mits have been. +

While I do not particularly enjoy Howl-o-ween, moms to make Muffin and I dress up occasionally. I have provided some examples below with my thoughts.

Here I am as the Red Baron. You can't really see it, but my eyes are closed underneath the Doggles. For whatever reason, mom could not stop laughing and actually started crying. Muffin did not like these on me and tried to rip them off my head.

Here is Muffin as the Easter Muffin. I honestly have no idea how moms was able to get those ears on her and she just didn't rip them off. She is probably holding her in a death grip and two seconds after this picture was taken, the ears were destroyed.

 

 This is just cruel. Again mom was laughing uncontrollably, but as you can see, I was very uncomfortable.

  

 Here I am as Mickey Mads, just taken the other day.

 I want to wish you all a Happy and Safe Howl-O-Ween as I pose with my pumpkin and until next time, Good Day!

Last Swims

This is the time of year where I say goodbye to the lakes. It is a ritual I have done since I was a wee pup, so basically I have done this ritual my whole life. It has been a few weeks since I have had swims because the moms had to go to Florida for work and then we went to Acadia for my most awesomest adventure. Each year, I know the swims will come to an end when the leaves start to fall of the trees and this weekend, there were lots of leaves on the ground. So I know, that soon, there will be no more swims at the lakes until we come back in April.

The process of saying good bye to the lakes is quite tedious. First, I must do my usual routine which involves Muffin getting up at some ungodly hour to do her business. Every morning she does this I try to weasel my way into staying in bed. This usually includes ranger crawling up the bed to some hard cuddling. This does not work and I am forced to go outside with Muffin to do business. I amuse the moms and get off the deck after some coaxing and go and do my business but, I am still tired and want to go back to bet. I eventually convince Muffin to stop barking and come in and she usually sleeps for another hour. Next, Muffin gets up again because she is ready to start the day. I am not sure why she just cannot stay in bed because, by this time, I am the small spoon and am very comfy. Begrudgingly I get up and start to get excited for my last swims of the year.

Normally, moms would put my swim jingle and picky collar on, but those were left in one of the bags from Acadia back at the homes. So the moms need to improvise and make a harness out of our leash. After the moms make their morning coffee, we proceed to walk to the lakes with large orange chuckit and my buoy. With all the leaves on the ground, I know this swim could be the last one. I brace myself for the cooler water as not all my winter furs have come in. Moms tell me that this swim will be good for me cause I am starting to stink... I am not sure what that means. Anyway, like all other swims, moms toss my buoy into the lakes and I swim after it. By now, the lake level is very low (another indication that there are few, if any swims left) so I can practically walk out to my buoy. I don't walk though, that would be an insult to the last swims if I were to walk.

I swim and retrieve and swim and retrieve and this is how I say goodbye to the lakes. You see, there is no goodbye to the lakes because I know, I will see the lakes again in April after the snow is gone. I will again brace myself for the chill of the lake waters and swim and retrieve and swim and retrieve. Though I will miss my lakes and the swims, my next favorite friend will hold me over... SNOWS! Until the spring lakes, Good Day!

ACADIA

So it has been a while since I last blogged, but that is because my Moms were planning a large meeting for work. However, I knew once they returned from Florida, that my bestest adventure would begin!

My moms began discussing going to Acadia for several years now, and finally they decided to make it happen. From 10/3-10/7 we would be going up to Mid Coast Maine to camp and hike. Muffin and I had been training for several months getting into tip top shape and our moms were buying gear, lots of gear (they both admit to having a gear problem) to make sure we had everything we needed to stay in the great outdoors for a few days. I, myself, was not sure about this cloth house thing and Muffin was concerned about her knee while hiking. So we were prepared with harnesses, first aid kits, plenty of water and cameras to document our trip. We were ready for anything, well, almost anything.

Then the unthinkable happened. Those damn politicians in Washington couldn't come to a stupid decision on something ridiculous, so they just shut down! That's right, they shutdown the government which included all non-essential employees who work at National Parks. Well, Acadia is a National Park. OH NO! My Acadia trip is ruined just days away from my biggest adventure of all time, I thought. My moms had planned to stay in Blackwoods Campgound which was in the park, but due to the shutdown people had 48 hours to vacate the premises. What about my cloth house? Where were we to stay? OH NO Moms! Thankfully, the good people at Koa Oceanside Campground had plenty of tent sites available so we were able to secure a site there! Hooray! The US Government won't stop us!

Once we got there (it was a long car ride) OH MY DOG! The smells of the woods and the oceans was wonderful! Being outside with my Moms all day, was even more wonderful! Walking around to new places was hugely wonderful! Sleeping in the cloth house was totally awesome and snuggly (I had my own sleeping bag!)!! And, the most wonderful thing at Acadia... HIKING!!!

 

The first day we did a figure 8 loop around upper and lower Hadlock Ponds. This hike was not too difficult for Muffin or I and was about a 5 mile round trip. It was wonderful to walk through the woods with my moms and muffin and follow the trails that wind through the woods. Though I could not swim in either pond (it is a public water supply), I did illegally dip my toes and Muffin got quite a large drink.

The next day, we did a different type of hike that was a long the road. I must admit that this hike was boring as there were no rocks to climb and it felt like we were being stalked by a taxi. Anyway, Moms went into town for a few hours to get lunch and Muffin and I slept in the car. Then to my surprise, Moms took us out of the car and we got to walk in downtown Bar Harbor! Not only that, but Moms were even able to take us into stores!!! I didn't want to blow this opportunity, so I made sure I was a good girl. Lots of people came up to pet me, which was nice, but it was a great time being in downtown with my moms (except for the fact that I was afraid of the BIG horseys). I even got to sit on a park bench!

The last day was my favorite day. Since the park was closed, Moms couldn't access all the trails, but they found a good one called Beech Mtn. Now being named Beech Mtn., I thought that there was going to be a beach and a buoy and a swim at the top. So I proceeded to sprint up 0.4 miles to the tippy top of the mountain. My mom kept saying that I was going to give her a heart attack, but she kept up with my speedy pace since I was so excited! There were rocks to climb, views to see and lots of people at the top to pet me! I was such a good hiker that Moms now call me a PH (professional hiker) and they have promised me that we will hike more. Muffin also did really good hiking even though she was slower than me.

So that was my big Acadia Adventure! Moms have promised that we go back again since there was so much of the park we did not see because it was closed! I had a great time and can't wait to go again. Until next time, Good Day!

Sandy Buoy

I love many things as I have shared with you. I love most things in my world, moms, people, other dogs, cookies, ball... but there is one thing that I hate... SANDY BUOY! As you have seen in the past, when I swim, I chase a orange buoy. My moms throw them into the lakes and I love retrieving them. When I come out of the water, I have my post swim routine. I run out to the grassy area, drop my buoy, shake and they proceed to roll on my buoy. My moms always laugh because they don't understand why I do this routine everytime I swim. I would tell you, but I honestly don't know either. It's in my bloods and I have an urge to roll on my buoy so it smells like me. BUT, there is one thing that happens every so often.... I accidently drop my buoy into the sand! OH NO! What do I do?? I can't roll on it because I refuse to get my body all sandy! I can't pick it up because then I would get sands in my mouth! Oh god.... my buoy... I want to swim, but it is so sandy! I get all confused and then... well you need to see for youself...

So you see... the only way to get a sandy buoy out and back in the lakes is to dig, dig, dig, dig. Until next time, Good Day!

Kousin Koa

Over this past weekend I got to meet my cousin Koa. Koa is an 11 week Shiba Inu (pronounced "eenu"). For those of you that do not know about Shiba Inu's, they are Japanese dog breed that is quite aloof and cat like. They do not get very large (only about 20lbs) and they have what is called a "Shiba Scream". I did not hear this dreadful scream this weekend, but I have heard it is terrifying! Anyway, Shibas are not for everyone, but they are very good dogs. They love their people, and that is about it. They certainly do not like being picked up by strangers or family members that they met two days ago. They also do not like it when they have a dingleberry... very traumatic. But like all dogs, they are good dogs. They love to play with toys and will tolerate other dogs. TOLERATE. For more information on Shiba Inu's, you can visit the AKC website.

Anyway, this weekend I got to meet my first Shiba Inu, Koa. Koa is my new cousin and arrived from Arkansas last week. He lives in Boston with his Mom and Dad and over the weekend they came up to see me at the lakes! I was very excited to see Derek and Karen! I know that Derek was not a dog person so I always gravitated to him. I even made him break out in hives on year because I wanted him to like me. Karen is wonderful and always pets me! This time, Derek and Karen had a surprise for me... a puppy! I immediately wanted to pounce on him, but my mom had to restrain me. I was not thrilled. I was put in the house and waited impatiently until Koa was brought inside. How exciting! A PUPPY TO PLAY WITH!!!! Except for the fact that Koa did not want to play with me! How can a puppy not want to play with me? I am super friendly, a great tugger, I will submit to you and show you my belly, you can play with all my toys... what more could you ask for little Koa??

I wanted to know the answer... so I kept following him around the house. "Koa. Koa? Koa? Koa, come here? Koa, I want to ask you something. Koa." He wouldn't talk to me... he just kept running away and protecting his soft underbelly with his tail (strange). I felt dejected...why was Koa not playing with me? Then, something happened. I forced him into a corner because I wanted to know why he wasn't talking to me or answering my questions. I was determined for him to answer me, and he did. He said, "Go Away" and tried to nip my nose. Confused, I walked away. Mom told me that I needed to give him some space. So I did. I let him rest and explore the house while I left him alone. I thought to myself, maybe he will play with me tomorrow, and he did!

He barked at me and put himself in play position! Then I put myself in play position and got very excited because I was so happy! Finally Koa wanted to play with me! I was so happy that I started to run and run and run and run until I knocked him over! Sorry Koa, but you make me so happy! Welcome to the family! I love you! Until I see you again my little friend, Good Day!

Bikejoring

"Bikejorning is a dog mushing activity related to skijoring, canicross, and dog scootering. It is a recreation or sport where a harnessed dog or team of dogs attached to a towline have to pull and run ahead of a cyclist" thank you Wikipedia for this wonderfull definition.

I had no idea that his wonderful sport existed. You think that a sprinter like myself (my mom called me a whippet when I was younger) would know of such a wonderful sport! Alas, I did not, but after yesterday my whole world changed.

My mom got a bike from EMS on Monday and jokingly said, "I am going to have Madi try bikejoring". I did not take this as a joke. I wanted to go! I wanted to run! So yesterday, after Moxie and I went for a walk around our cul-de-sac, Mom got her bike and held my leash. She started to pedal and, at first, I was not sure what to do. Do I run? Do I sniff the ground? Which way do I go? My instincts took over and were shouting RUN, MADI, RUN! (Do you get the Forest Gump reference there?) So I did! Then mom started pedaling faster, so I ran faster. The faster she pedaled, the faster I ran! It was glorious to feel the wind through my furs in a full sprint!!!

Then I could feel the leash tense up, so I started to slow. Mom said "Wait, Madi" so I slowed to a trot until Mom got closer to me and we stopped together. She looked at me with a big smile and said "Good job Mads! Let's turn around and go the other way." So we did and I got big praises afterwords!

Hello Bikejorning!!! Where have you been all these years!  Until next time, Good Day!

and to add to the list of my favorite things...

Mini hike!

I love being in the outdoors and exploring on trails! My mom will tell you that I am quite good at navigating my way through a trail system and I always know which way to go. My mom was able to take some action video of me and Moxie this weekend as we did a 3.5 hike in the woods over the weekend. This hike is one of many that we are doing in preparation for our big adventure in a few weeks. I know you want to know what the big adventure is, but you must wait! Just like my mom tells me I must wait for my ball, you must wait until I reveal the big adventure to you. I don't like waiting either, but my mom tells me that it is good for me and the end result is worth it (what ever that means). Check out the video below and see me in action! I am the one on the left with the "thin low tail". Moxie is the one on the right with the over-sized, otter tail that is always upright. I apologize for my mothers mouth as she nearly killed herself on that tiny little stump!

It was a wonderful hike and toward the end, Moxie and I also got to go for a bonus swim at Beach #12!  But when we got home we literally passed out! Here we are sleeping with our two balls and TD 61 (Tuff Duck). It was a wonderful weekend and I am still tired. Until next time, good day!

This is one of my favorite things!

Swimming! 

I have been swimming since I was just a wee pup! Every morning on the weekends in the summer, Moxie and I go for a swim in Sebago Lake! It is totally awesome! I have a buoy that I retrieve  but I have gone through many of them over the years. Moxie is quite different. Mom says that she marches to the beat of her own drum. I am in agreement. Moxie swims after a chuck it handle. Not the ball coming out of the chuck it, just the orange handle. Odd. Anyway, I need to go get toweled off now. Until next time, good day.

Greetings Talking Dogs!

Hello. My name is Madi. I am a 6 year old chocolate female Labrador Retriever. As you can see, I can talk. My best friend, and closest companion is Moxie, also a 6 year old chocolate female Labrador Retriever. She can also talk, but not quite as often as me. She sings more though.

Anyway, I want to share our adventures with you and all other talking dogs. I know there are more of you out there but, big shout-out to Tupper, the official mascot of Bryant University in Smithfield, RI. WOOF!

This weekend's adventure will be at Sebago Lake in Maine. Moxie (aka Muffin, aka Chunkin, aka Big One, etc.) are planning at least two swims, and some warm up hiking for a early fall adventure that I will tell you about later. As for now, I am starting to get the "big blinks" which means I am ready for bed. Until next time... Good Day!